Cartoon by Chris Yoder.
Showing posts with label spelling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spelling. Show all posts
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Can Randomly Placed Letters Form an Intelligible Word?
According to an e-mail that has been around for several years (and is supposedly based on Cambridge University research), as long as the first and last letters of a word are positioned accurately, the order of the internal letters should not interfere with a reader's ability to interpret the word.
This past December, a new video debunking this claim made the rounds.
In case you missed it on The Spelling Blog, Language Hat, Mighty Red Pen or anywhere else it may have appeared, here it is:
Excellent analysis from What You Ought to Know.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Euro-English Fonetics
From an e-mail I received:
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vordskontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vordskontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Monday, June 21, 2010
This Baby is Missing a Letter
A good friend spotted this sign in a restroom at Disney World and snapped a photo to share with me. He commented that it amazed him how much the deletion of one letter from the beginning of a word can totally change the pronunciation of the word. I think the oddity of this example comes from the fact that when a string of consonants starts a word and one of the consonants is dropped the resulting word usually still rhymes (ex. "bloomed"..."loomed", "crusted"..."rusted", "strap"..."trap"..."rap", and so on).
That is not the case here, and part of the reason is that we are talking about consonant sounds, not letters. The word "changing" may start with two consonants in alphabetical spelling, however, phonetically, the letters "c" and "h" combine to form one sound - /ʧ/(aka /č/).
So, phonetically, we have "hanging" /hæŋəŋ/ compared to "changing" /ʧenʤəŋ/.
By adding the letter "c" to the "h" in the word "hanging", the word initial sound changes from a fricative to an affricate. Because sounds like to hang out with other sounds with whom they share commonalities, it is not surprising to see the affricate /ʤ/ in the word "changing". It also does not surprise me that the /æ/, which is a lax vowel, becomes /e/ (a tense vowel) in "changing" because if consonants were classified by tenseness, I would think that affricates are more tense than fricatives.
That is not the case here, and part of the reason is that we are talking about consonant sounds, not letters. The word "changing" may start with two consonants in alphabetical spelling, however, phonetically, the letters "c" and "h" combine to form one sound - /ʧ/(aka /č/).
So, phonetically, we have "hanging" /hæŋəŋ/ compared to "changing" /ʧenʤəŋ/.
By adding the letter "c" to the "h" in the word "hanging", the word initial sound changes from a fricative to an affricate. Because sounds like to hang out with other sounds with whom they share commonalities, it is not surprising to see the affricate /ʤ/ in the word "changing". It also does not surprise me that the /æ/, which is a lax vowel, becomes /e/ (a tense vowel) in "changing" because if consonants were classified by tenseness, I would think that affricates are more tense than fricatives.
Friday, May 7, 2010
Playing with Spelling, Sounds and Semantics - Linguistics Humor Part II
1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
2. A will is a dead giveaway.
3. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
4. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
5. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
6. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
7. A calendar's days are numbered.
8. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
9. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
10. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
11. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
12. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
13. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
14. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
15. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.
16. Tonto’s banker…the Loan Arranger.
17. If a skunk went to church, would it sit in its own pew?
- From an e-mail, author/s unknown
For more linguistics humor check out:
Playing with Spelling, Sounds and Semantics - Linguistics Humor Part I
2. A will is a dead giveaway.
3. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
4. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
5. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
6. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
7. A calendar's days are numbered.
8. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
9. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
10. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
11. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
12. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
13. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
14. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
15. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.
16. Tonto’s banker…the Loan Arranger.
17. If a skunk went to church, would it sit in its own pew?
- From an e-mail, author/s unknown
For more linguistics humor check out:
Playing with Spelling, Sounds and Semantics - Linguistics Humor Part I
Monday, August 10, 2009
The #1 Reason To Be Religious About Spelling Words Correctly
A young monk arrives at a monastery. He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript. So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up! In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son."
He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscripts are held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years. Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot. So, the young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him. He sees him banging his head against the wall and wailing.
"We missed the R! We missed the R! We missed the R!"
His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably.The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong, father?" With A choking voice, the old abbot replies,
"The word was... CELEBRATE!!!"
###
*This humorous e-mail I received does not mention the fact that 'celibate' is spelled with an 'i' in place of the second 'e' but I still got a kick out of it.
Friday, June 5, 2009
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Before There Was Ghoti - An Earlier Example of Spelling and Pronunciation Inconsistencies in English
A previous post on this blog was about George Bernard Shaw's alternate spelling of the word 'fish' as ghoti. He supported using this spelling to demonstrate the inconsistencies in English spelling and pronunciation.
According to "The Word Weavers" by Jean Aitchison, before the spelling ghoti was used for 'fish' there was another word with an alternate spelling used by an individual who was unhappy with the spelling of English words.
In 1845, Alexander Ellis spelled the word 'orthography' as eolotthowghrhoighuay based on the following sounds: George, Colonel, Matthew, knowledge, ghost, rheumatic, Beauvoir, laugh, and quay.
According to "The Word Weavers" by Jean Aitchison, before the spelling ghoti was used for 'fish' there was another word with an alternate spelling used by an individual who was unhappy with the spelling of English words.
In 1845, Alexander Ellis spelled the word 'orthography' as eolotthowghrhoighuay based on the following sounds: George, Colonel, Matthew, knowledge, ghost, rheumatic, Beauvoir, laugh, and quay.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Mackinaw vs. Mackinac - Spelling and Pronunciation
A reader recently inquired about the two different versions of spelling Mackinac/Mackinaw in Michigan place names. The following excerpt from a Joe Grimm article that appeared in the Detroit Free Press is a wonderful explanation for the variation in spelling and the proper pronunciation.How do you say it? It ends in "awe," never "ack". Never, ever. Make Mackinac rhyme with Saginaw. Doesn't that sound nicer? If you simply MUST say "ack", you can call the bridge "The Big Mac." That's the only time you can say "ack".
So, what's with the spelling? Well, it's confusing. So, while we're at it, let's get the spelling right, too.
Mackinac Island
Mackinac Bridge
Straits of Mackinac
Fort Michilimackinac
Mackinaw City
Why the confusion? Blame the French. And the British. You can even blame the area's Native Americans. When Europeans got here (the French first), they picked up on all these words spoken by the local people and tried to write them down in their own language.
Are there other Mackinaw things? You bet. A mackinaw can also be cloth or coat made from thick woolen material, pronounced with an "awe."
Mackinac Bridge
Straits of Mackinac
Fort Michilimackinac
Mackinaw City
Why the confusion? Blame the French. And the British. You can even blame the area's Native Americans. When Europeans got here (the French first), they picked up on all these words spoken by the local people and tried to write them down in their own language.
Are there other Mackinaw things? You bet. A mackinaw can also be cloth or coat made from thick woolen material, pronounced with an "awe."
What does Mackinac - or Mackinaw - even mean? Mackinac - and Mackinaw - are abbreviations for Michinnimakinong. Michinnimakinong is four words mashed together; mish-inni-maki-nong. In English they mean great connecting sound fault land or place. That, of course, is a good way to describe the Mackinac area.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
The Rabbit Rule
A week or so ago I posted some statistics about English spelling from an article in American Educator. This article also mentioned an English spelling rule that was new to me, the Rabbit Rule. Upon researching the Rabbit Rule, I realized that I remembered the rule from elementary school but I didn't know the rule by this name. I also discovered a few other English spelling rules that have acquired new names since I was in elementary school (ages upon ages ago). The rules are as follows:
The Rabbit Rule: Double the consonants b, d, g, m, n and p after a short vowel in a two syllable word.
The Banana Rule: Every unaccented open-a syllable will change to schwa. An a at the end of a word is never accented, so always changes to schwa (plasma). An a by itself at the beginning of a word usually changes to schwa (adopt). In three syllable words the last syllable is never accented. Only one syllable in a word is accented. So if a three syllable word has two open-a syllables that are not accented, both of them will change to schwa.
The Picnic Chicken Basket Rule: In the middle of multi-syllable words, spell the k-sound with a c when you can. If a c won't work, use ck if the k-sound is right after a short vowel. Otherwise, use k.
The Catch Lunch Rule: This rule applies to the ch-sound at the end of a word. Use tch when you have a short vowel coming right before the ch-sound, otherwise use ch. Exceptions: such, much rich, which.
The Milk Truck Rule: This rule applies to the k-sound at the end of a word. Never end a one syllable word using a c. If you have a short vowel sound coming right before the k-sound use a ck. Otherwise, use k.
The Floss Rule: Double the consonants f, l and s at the end of a one syllable word following a short vowel. Common exceptions to this rule are gas, yes, and bus.
How did anyone ever learn to spell without these fancily named rules. I think I will now go eat a picnic lunch of rabbit, bananas and milk after which I will immediately floss.
The Rabbit Rule: Double the consonants b, d, g, m, n and p after a short vowel in a two syllable word.
The Banana Rule: Every unaccented open-a syllable will change to schwa. An a at the end of a word is never accented, so always changes to schwa (plasma). An a by itself at the beginning of a word usually changes to schwa (adopt). In three syllable words the last syllable is never accented. Only one syllable in a word is accented. So if a three syllable word has two open-a syllables that are not accented, both of them will change to schwa.
The Picnic Chicken Basket Rule: In the middle of multi-syllable words, spell the k-sound with a c when you can. If a c won't work, use ck if the k-sound is right after a short vowel. Otherwise, use k.
The Catch Lunch Rule: This rule applies to the ch-sound at the end of a word. Use tch when you have a short vowel coming right before the ch-sound, otherwise use ch. Exceptions: such, much rich, which.
The Milk Truck Rule: This rule applies to the k-sound at the end of a word. Never end a one syllable word using a c. If you have a short vowel sound coming right before the k-sound use a ck. Otherwise, use k.
The Floss Rule: Double the consonants f, l and s at the end of a one syllable word following a short vowel. Common exceptions to this rule are gas, yes, and bus.
How did anyone ever learn to spell without these fancily named rules. I think I will now go eat a picnic lunch of rabbit, bananas and milk after which I will immediately floss.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Park it...and Learn to Spell
My father sent me this picture that that was snapped by a friend of his. It is from the parking lot of Arizona State University Polytechnic Campus at Phoenix-Mesa Gateway Airport. According to my father's friend, this misspelling has been there for about seven months.One would think that someone (student or staff) from the academic institution would have noticed the spelling error immediately and had it corrected as soon as the paint could be painted over.
Learn to spell...or at least park it and be more attentive.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Noah Webster on Spelling
"Spelling is the foundation of reading and the greatest ornament of writing."
-Noah Webster
-Noah Webster
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Playing with Spelling, Sounds and Semantics - Linguistics Humor
1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island,
but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker,
but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because
it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder
and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope,
it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road
and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in
Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race.
They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.
The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.
One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.
When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was,
a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle,
he just didn't have the balls to do it.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was
a small medium at large.
20. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes inverse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts.
In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary,
they got a taste of religion.
24. Don't join dangerous cults:
Practice safe sects!
He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island,
but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker,
but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because
it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder
and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope,
it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road
and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in
Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race.
They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.
The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.
One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.
When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was,
a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle,
he just didn't have the balls to do it.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was
a small medium at large.
20. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes inverse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts.
In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary,
they got a taste of religion.
24. Don't join dangerous cults:
Practice safe sects!
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Shaked Rattled and Rolled
The other day my son said to me, "Mom, how do you spell shaked?"
I responded, "S-H-O-O-K."
He said, "No wonder it didn't look right."
I responded, "S-H-O-O-K."
He said, "No wonder it didn't look right."
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Prescriptive Grammar versus Descriptive Grammar
In a post a few weeks back I mentioned prescriptive grammar without really explaining what it is and for that reason I thought I would delve a bit further into the concept of prescriptive grammar - which also requires a knowledge of the concept of descriptive grammar. Both prescriptive and descriptive grammar are approaches to studying grammar and its usage.
Prescriptive grammar is what we are taught in school. Prescriptive grammar follows strict rules that can not be broken. Additionally, in prescriptive grammar there is always a right way and a wrong way. Descriptive grammar, on the other hand, simply describes grammar the way it is used every day by people. There are no set rules. There is no right or wrong.
In sum, the term prescriptive is used to tell how language should be and the term descriptive tells how language is. Grammar is not the only concept in linguistics that can be prescribed or described; spelling and phonetics can as well, for example, yesterday's post with the Hickphonics/English Dictionary was a descriptive account of the grammar and pronunciations of a particular dialect.
I have studied linguistics from both prescriptive and descriptive points of view. I know what the prescriptive rules are but I do not consider myself a strict prescriptivist. I far prefer studying language in its everyday use and I do not believe there are rights or wrongs, only variations that occur for regular, explainable reasons.
Prescriptive grammar is what we are taught in school. Prescriptive grammar follows strict rules that can not be broken. Additionally, in prescriptive grammar there is always a right way and a wrong way. Descriptive grammar, on the other hand, simply describes grammar the way it is used every day by people. There are no set rules. There is no right or wrong.
In sum, the term prescriptive is used to tell how language should be and the term descriptive tells how language is. Grammar is not the only concept in linguistics that can be prescribed or described; spelling and phonetics can as well, for example, yesterday's post with the Hickphonics/English Dictionary was a descriptive account of the grammar and pronunciations of a particular dialect.
I have studied linguistics from both prescriptive and descriptive points of view. I know what the prescriptive rules are but I do not consider myself a strict prescriptivist. I far prefer studying language in its everyday use and I do not believe there are rights or wrongs, only variations that occur for regular, explainable reasons.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Scripps National Spelling Bee: More Than Just Spelling
What a great time of year it is for word, vocabulary, etymology and spelling lovers. The Scripps National Spelling Bee begins today. Yes, I know it is call a spelling bee but viewing it is also a great way to learn new words and their definitions and etymologies, in addition to their spelling. In other words, watching the spelling bee is a great way to expand your vocabulary.
For example, here are some of the winning words from years past:
crustaceology: The branch of zoology that studies crustaceans. Latin crusta = "crust, hard shell."
eudaemonic: Producing happiness and well-being. Greek eu- + daimon = "good or happy spirit."
esquamulose: In botany, lacking minute scales; not squamulose. Latin e - "not" + squamula- "small scales."
hydrophyte: A plant adapted to grow in water. Greek hydro + phyte
vivisepulture: An act or instance of burying someone alive. Latin vivus 'alive' + sepulture 'burying.'
appoggiatura: an embellishing note or tone preceding an essential melodic note or tone and usually written as a note of smaller size. Borrowed from Italian appoggiatura, derived from appoggiare, meaning “to lean.”
Interestingly, Spell Check did not recognize even one of these words.
The Quarterfinals are on ESPN360.com this afternoon, the Semifinals are on ESPN tomorrow afternoon, and the Finals are on ABC tomorrow evening.
For example, here are some of the winning words from years past:
crustaceology: The branch of zoology that studies crustaceans. Latin crusta = "crust, hard shell."
eudaemonic: Producing happiness and well-being. Greek eu- + daimon = "good or happy spirit."
esquamulose: In botany, lacking minute scales; not squamulose. Latin e - "not" + squamula- "small scales."
hydrophyte: A plant adapted to grow in water. Greek hydro + phyte
vivisepulture: An act or instance of burying someone alive. Latin vivus 'alive' + sepulture 'burying.'
appoggiatura: an embellishing note or tone preceding an essential melodic note or tone and usually written as a note of smaller size. Borrowed from Italian appoggiatura, derived from appoggiare, meaning “to lean.”
Interestingly, Spell Check did not recognize even one of these words.
The Quarterfinals are on ESPN360.com this afternoon, the Semifinals are on ESPN tomorrow afternoon, and the Finals are on ABC tomorrow evening.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Business Names Gone Bad
My kids have been acting up today, I would like to exchange them for some other kids please. Just kidding.
This must be a store where people take their kids' outgrown clothing and toys to exchange them, it can't possibly be where you take your kid to have a sex change.
I also recently heard about a swimming pool chemical company called Poolife. I can't imagine anyone would want to bring poo to life in their swimming pool. A double "L" would have been beneficial here.
There is an Internet business named Publishit.com. I wonder......do they only publish sh*t?
I'm sure there are many more poorly named businesses out there and I would love to hear about more so please send me your Business Names Gone Bad as a comment.
It just goes to show you that when someone is naming their new business, they should really take into consideration the way the spelling and words of the name can be reinterpreted.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
A Euro English Take on Words
I received a humorous email this morning that I thought I would share today because it revisits the subject matter in my post about George Bernard Shaw and Phonetics. Read, notice the alternative spelling of words and enjoy...
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear upkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when thetroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining"ou" and after ziz fifz yer , ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in zeforst plas.
Apparently this is a fairly common joke about English spelling that can be readily found with different variations when doing an internet search; however, I had never seen it and thought it was fun. And, interestingly, there is a website called foolswisdom.com that claims Euro English is not a joke and is a serious project to make English words and spelling easier to teach.
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear upkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when thetroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining"ou" and after ziz fifz yer , ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in zeforst plas.
Apparently this is a fairly common joke about English spelling that can be readily found with different variations when doing an internet search; however, I had never seen it and thought it was fun. And, interestingly, there is a website called foolswisdom.com that claims Euro English is not a joke and is a serious project to make English words and spelling easier to teach.
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